Monday, January 16, 2012

Winners and Losers

I went to Mankato yesterday. First stop was Office Max for file folders, then to the mall for a chicken schwarma and a little clearance rack  shopping. Sitting there in the food court, totally mesmerized with people watching, came the realization that I really don't get out much. Seriously, I could have sat there forever. Again, confirmation that I have an extremely low threshold for entertainment.

I ended up at Sam's Club where I needed to buy W2 forms.

Here is where the universe of the infrequent, inept shopper and a retail magnate collide. Some emerge triumphant, with only the items on a list in the cart along with a few sensible purchases of milk, bread, pretzel chips and lowfat spinach dip. And happen upon something that was new and totally delicious:
served with oven baked crunchy chicken thighs.

I should have known better, but I always check out the clothing selection. I bought a great sweater there. Once. A long time ago. Why, oh why, did I even give this a second glance???

I can't explain it, but all I saw at the moment was "essential" bra. Are all other bras optional or unnecessary?  So now take a look at her boobs, or more like loaf-shaped area where boobs should be. That is pretty much the result of wearing this undergarment.
I know.
I bought a 3-pack.
Yes, I wore it today. A boob-loaf. Loud and proud, people.

I kept looking at them all day. It wasn't natural. I can go hours, days, heck probably weeks, without even looking at my boobs.
Today: Totally fixated. Couldn't take my eyes off them. Or it.

Guess I'll spare you the details of the 5-pack of underpants.


  1. What I saw was the "Bally" and the byline "total fitness" ... which would have steered me elsewhere for bras...
    and underpants to me are rather generic, as I gave up "exhibition undressing" back when I gave up "total fitness"...but I could be all wrong...

  2. I know, who buys a bra at Sam's club??? but in the moment I thought it might be something that I could wear under a tank top at the beach.

  3. Is this what you ment when you told me you got "file folders"?